booze

Now, I don't normally drink due to medication issues, but I did take a nip last night to see the New Year in... and here's the poison himself and I partook of at midnight! Yummy stuff, quite sweet, but me not being a sophisticated drinker, it really hit the spot... :)

I'm not doing the resolution thing, but I'm glad to say I managed to do 1K words towards Watching the Detective today... which sort of augurs well for the year. I think it would have been a bad omen if I hadn't done anything at all today. It was probably 1000 words of crap, but words of crap are words that can always be edited. And I've got to keep remembering that instead of being afraid to write anything... First drafts are just that... *first* drafts. Even with stories... Sometimes, when the gods smile, it is possible to get a thing that goes right first time. But that's rare... and I mustn't be disappointed when it doesn't happen. When I first started writing, I did gazillions of drafts, so I mustn't be ashamed of the fact that it still sometimes takes a few...

Right, pep talk to self over...

--
Telly: The Great Escape
Chocolate: Cadbury's Chocolate Biscuit [just one...]
Mood: okay
Writing: Watching The Detective 1K words today
Reading: Radio Times
RSI: not too bad

felt like doing a blog thing...

The Movie Of Your Life Is An Indie Flick

You do things your own way - and it's made for colorful times. Your life hasn't turned out how anyone expected, thank goodness! Your best movie matches: Clerks, Garden State, Napoleon Dynamite

If Your Life Was a Movie, What Genre Would It Be?

2007 ahead...

more Giselle

I've watched the whole ballet now, and I'm slightly more warmly disposed towards Albrecht. On the strength of the performance of danseur Johan Kobborg in Act 2, I can believe he really loved Giselle after all, and was basically a mixed up guy who got torn between two worlds. Maybe he should have been honest with her, but hey, men [and women] aren't always honest with the people they're involved with and care for... I also re-read the story in a super book by my friend and web client Adele Geras. In Adele's interpretation, the tale is told from Albrecht's POV and she vividly conveys his confusion, regret and love for Giselle. I also feel more sympathy for Giselle... poor lass just succumbed to a relationship cock up, and I'm sure most women in the world have been there too. She was far more noble about it in the end than a lot of us would have been too...

I still feel v. sorry for poor old Hilarion, who didn't deserve his fate, because basically he was a good guy. But I suppose that plotwise, the ballet has to illustrate the power of the Wilis to dance a man to death, and he was an obvious candidate if they weren't going to kill off Albrecht....

But really, with ballet, it's less about the story and more about the performance. And having read a few synopses of famous ballets, they all seem pretty mental... It's the beautiful dancing that matters, and even if the reasons for the emotions are a bit contrived, the artistic power of gifted dancers can just make you sob, even if you think the story is rather silly...

ps. have decided not to post about New Year's resolutions and stuff, because I'm starting to find that it's all really getting on my tits! What's the point of making wild pronouncements about the year to come? To my mind it's asking for trouble...

not to be outdone

not to be outdone by Tilly, the supreme champion of demented posing - King Kuffer - hits back with killer!

I really must snap a few shots of Alice and Mulder soon, as the lads seem to be dominating this blog at the mo...

better?

Well, I think I'm beginning to get a handle on that paranormal story of mine... but even though I might end up with something I quite like, I still don't feel all that optimistic that the editor will like it. It might end up being one for a future self published shorts collection or something... It's been very weird to get the tone for this thing. It's more a slightly fun story, and not linked to any established mythos... just something inexplicable that may or may not be a trick of the imagination. Don't know whether this can be classed as paranormal or not, hence some of my doubts about it. If I get it right though... it'll be one for the delectation of my Vincent friends... I think the title alone gives sufficient hint of that... ie. the thing's called Watching The Detective!

Have been watching stuff to do with ballet in the last few days, as background research for TechnoGothic, which has an ex dancer as a heroine. Some behind the scenes stuff has been particularly useful, and now I'm watching a performance of the great romantic ballet Giselle. Masses of elements of gothic tragedy in this story... and the juxtaposition of love and death is always powerful, but the plotline really does irritate me in a lot of ways because Prince Albrecht, the supposed hero, is such a jerk! And Giselle herself is a nitwit for falling for such a selfish user. Down to earth Hillarion is the guy who really loves her, and what does he get? Bumped off by the magic dancing fairies when he should actually be *rewarded* for his love and devotion! While soppy, self centered Albrecht gets away with it... He's supposed to be eternally sorrowful, but I bet you anything when the curtain goes down he v. quickly gets over it and is back to chasing innocent peasant babes in a different village to get his end away before very long...

--
Telly: Giselle
Chocolate: Cadbury's Chocolate Biscuits
Mood: okay
Writing: Watching The Detective 1.4K words so far
Reading: Radio Times
RSI: not bad, have deduced that my current twinges are due to cracking walnuts!!!

and now for something....

completely different...

The last post was a bit depressing and downbeat, so in an attempt to redress the balance, here's Tilly again! Although Kuffer is still the supreme champion of the downright bonkers pose, Tilly is definitely a promising stylist too...

oh dear...

I've started writing again, but it's proving hard, hard, hard at the moment. Horrible. Like bashing my head against a brick wall or trying to plait fog.

I'm trying to write a paranormal short story for an anthology... and it's not going well. There are many problems:

1. have gone through several ideas and they're all weak as tap water...
2. have started two, actually, and neither has come to life...
3. the more I try, the weaker, more wooden, and more contrived whatever I try to write becomes...

The biggest problem is, I think, that I'm constantly aware of the competition to get into this anthology, and I start measuring myself against the 'opposition' before I've even the faintest idea what sort of thing said opposition is writing... I hobble myself with thoughts about how 'fresh', 'groundbreaking', 'edgy' and 'literary' a lot of these folk are... and I throw myself into a depressing flat spin of panic because I know that's exactly what I'm *not*. I'm derivative. I mostly rehash themes of long, long standing and just hope that I can muddle through in my own peculiar way. But everybody these days is expecting this 'fresh' stuff... and *quite rightly*... and those of us who are unfresh [God, how revoltingly icky does that sound?] and basically pretty shallow in terms of psychological depth and all that are in big, big trouble. And it doesn't help that I had a story rejected for the previous anthology in this series... That has ****ed me up right royally.... And yeah, yeah, yeah, a real pro would put that behind her and come up with some dazzling sure thing for the next anthology. But that's easier said than done... well, it is for me...

However, having whinged like a good 'un here, I'm still going to keep on trying for a while yet. I don't want to give up and opt out. That's just being a total loser... But I may end up ditching the short I'm working on at the moment if it doesn't shape up soon and stop being an immense pile of pooh. At the moment, I have absolutely no idea whatsoever what I can replace it with... but I'll just have to hope and pray some tired old chestnut of an idea will suddenly present itself, along with a way of making itself sound not to boring and repetitive....


--
Telly: ballet
Chocolate: Cadbury's Chocolate Biscuits
Mood: not great
Writing: completely shitty and useless short story
Reading: Window XP Magazine
RSI: so so

back again... sort of...

Oh, it's hard, very hard, to get into the groove again after Christmas. In an ideal world, I'd just stay with this vibe... leisurely days where I get up late, watch telly most of the day, breaking off now and again to eat something delicious or have a natter with himself about something fairly inconsequential... A totally relaxed carry on, no worrying and fretting about writing at all, just chilling out, spending time with the cats... pure bliss. I don't think I'd miss writing at all if I had the money to opt out... I suppose I'd get bored eventually and maybe start writing bits and pieces of self indulgence, just to amuse myself... but think how much more pleasurable a kind of writing that would be when I could just doodle along doing exactly what I wanted and not fret about editorial guidelines or emerging market trends.

Still, it's not a perfect world, and I'm going to have to get back in the saddle sooner rather than later because I have a zillion things to do. But it's tough to focus... even on this babble here. I flit around the blogs and everybody else seems to be getting with the program. Reflecting thoughtfully on what they've achieved in 2006 or looking forward to what they'll be doing, or having published in 2007. Also making resolutions and worthy plans for career strategies or working methods in the coming year... Me? Well, just the thought of it makes me want to run round the house screaming in panic and waving my hands about!!! It's all so hard... there's so much to do... my 'writing head' seems to have turned to Christmas pudding, and I can barely seem to string two words together any more... I just want to crawl back to bed, and only pop my head out from under the covers to eat some chocolate or watch a repeated movie I've seen a dozen times before...
--
Telly: anything and everything
Chocolate: Cadbury's Chocolate Biscuit Selection
Mood: suppressed panic
Writing: not a word
Reading: Radio Times
RSI: unexpected sore, given I'm not doing anything!

Christmas Holidays...

I'm sort of opting out for the Christmas Break now... but if you fancy winning some triffic Black Lace books... esp. one exceptionally fab one of mine... Nip over to Lust Bites and join in a spiffing competition!

ugh, just in time for Christmas...

Dammit, I've got a cold, I think! Just in time for Christmas... nice one, you germs, you! My inclination at the moment is just to crawl into bed, rest up, and maybe emerge to cook the Christmas dinner in a joint operation with himself... but I've so much to do! And not just Christmas prep... I've got my vamp novella to get on with, some updates for a web client, a paranormal short that I'd also like to do [because I've finally had a worthwhile idea for it!] and I hardly dare think about the amount of annual accounts I have to catch up with, having not done any since around last June!!! I've also just sold a short-short to a new magazine, and I'd like do do more of those too... Ack, it's all too much!

I've just been giving the movie Underworld another chance... and I still don't like it! It's all flash and dash and shoot'emups, without benefit of any soul, artistry or characterisation. Everyone just stomps around shouting and frowning in a plot that makes very little sense. Oh, I'm certain the lads just love Kate Beckinsale prancing around in tight black vinyl, but I'm afraid no amount of sexy costuming can make up for a wooden performance and a permanent scowl. I'm sure she's a fine actress and has put in great performances in other roles, but in this, no, she's just irritating to watch.... After watching the charm, the beauty and the subtlety of the two Dracula interpretations I've been watching in the past few days, Underworld is woeful... All it's self important 'pronouncing' just seems silly and juvenile, compared to the rich performances of both Frank Langella and Gary Oldman as the Dark Count and the genuine drama of the classic plot. In the coming days, there's a new version of Drac on the Beeb, and I'll be watching that with interest... Not sure how I'll like the treatment, and or fact that it plays fast and loose with the traditional storyline... but I'm sure it can't be worse than Underworld.
--
Telly: Underworld... ugh... Life of Mammals
Chocolate: Tesco Swiss Milk
Mood: weary... viral...
Writing: bits of ideas
Reading: Radio Times
RSI: not bad

Atilly the Cat

Proving that it's not just Kuffer who can do mad positions... Tilly gets comfy on a pile of himself's coats!